Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Who could resist this?

From New York Shitty:

This. I have tried— and tried— to find the words to describe what you have just seen. Thankfully the owner of this apartment has been lavish with the photo-documentation. What these pictures have to say is way more than the proverbial 1,000 words. Note “the value-added” in the manner of a disco ball in the living room. Simply magnificent! Best to simply check out this listing and behold the, um, glory for yourself. You will not be disappointed!

From the ad:

Beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, but can be 3 bedroom if need be. Has living room, kitchen, 1 bathroom. Has a lot of mirrored walls looks like a upscale nightclub inside. 2 HUGE closets so you have plenty of closet place. This apartment comes fully furnished!!!! with raymour &flanigan furniture. King size bed, bunk beds, leather couch, bar, closed circuit tv, 2 big screen tvs, brand new refrigerator, brand new stove, blinds done for windows, you have everything you need in this apartment you can move right. Rent is $2,000 per month !!! you will need first months rent and last months rent and a $4,000 dollar security deposit for all furnishings, and a months security deposit. you will need $10,000 to move in to this apartment. (most of it is security and deposit. Apartment is in Ridgewood, queens, near pond road and myrtle avenue, near the m train. ONLY call if you have $10,000 to move in and have good credit.

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have no words.... Just when you think you've seen it all, you go to Queenscrap and you are left stunned.... again.

Anonymous said...

Would they give me credit if I use my own furniture?

Anonymous said...

Welcome to the "Pimp Crib" LOL

Anonymous said...

Oh I think this displays the common denominator of Queens taste very well - just think the home of planned communities and model housing has been reduced to this.

No wonder the boro is a laughing stock.

Anonymous said...

A Hollywood set designer in his or her dreams could not come up with a such a design for the realization of a dystopian American urban apartment of the early 21st century. This one needs to be preserved as a time capsule.

For the vocabulary-challenged, dystopian is just a word that means an imaginary Hell. Sadly, it lives in Ridgewood.

Anonymous said...

I smell a scam....

Anonymous said...

Why do our realtors, developers, politicians and newcomers hate us so much? What have we ever done to them?

Anonymous said...

Paul Vallone's pied a terre?

Anonymous said...

Somehow I have a feeling this apartment belongs to someone else, on vacation maybe, or in on the scam, and the 10 large "deposit" will never be recovered, and the apartment will never be rented.

Queens Crapper said...

Hey guys, click Miss Heather's link.

It's been updated. And the phone numbers linked to the property are quite revealing.

Johnny Joint said...

Whew! I'm gonna shoot my next porn flick there!

Anonymous said...

Wasn't the sequel to "The Sperminator" (pardon my French) shot there?

All those mirrors sure gets a rise out of me.

Anonymous said...

looks like a ho house/brothel.

Joe said...

Well aside the mess whats wrong with it?
I have a room just like it --only bigger, all original restored 60's stuff with zebra print carpet & lava and sputnik lamps, velvet Elvis.
Even some back-lit New York State Pavilion Kewall panel and blue globes for extra ambiance!!

-Joe

Will Deegan said...

Also extremely illegal to charge that much for security deposit in NYC. Last I checked the law says the max move in is first months, security and 1 month brokers fee.

Anonymous said...

hahahhahaa

Anonymous said...

for 10k deposit, I can get a luxury apt where celebrities live. Such morons. good luck to them..and good luck to any idiot willing to fork out money for this dump.