Sunday, September 30, 2007

Assault & Battery Tunnel

"Replacing an 82-year-old home that stood on the site, this McMansion on Annandale Lane in Little Neck is being built on an angle to make it face Little Neck Parkway so passing motorists will be able to feast their eyes on the brown-bricked pile of poop. Taking up every square inch of property and nearly projecting out into the street motorists may wind up driving their cars though its expansive arched entranceway in the mistaken impression that it’s a tunnel. Capitalizing on the opportunity the construction worker out front might collect fares in the wheelbarrow he’s pushing."

- Ken Klinger
Queens Crap ensign

And here's the "before" shot:

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh.....it's not that bad.

A couple of archers placed on the front balcony
to shoot at motorists who try to avoid paying the toll
and an iron portcullis under the arch.

Quite a castle for an ill bred pompous wannabee .

It would look still better if the lord of the manor
waged war against his neighbors.....
and burned them out so he might acquire
more land.

Then he could dig a moat around his fortress.....
to be filled with floodwater from the next storm surge.

Wadda ya think is suitable for a family coat of arms
to be emblazoned on the banners
to be flown from the towers ?

Anonymous said...

perhaps a few crocodiles for the moat too.

Anonymous said...

I can understand complaints if someone takes down a single family house and replaces it with a multi-family house or houses, or if they are violating building codes, but I don't see anything wrong with someone replacing a smaller house with a bigger, nice looking, well constructed house like this one. Are you just jealous that your neighbors have a bigger, better house than yours? You should all stop being haters. In this country, people have freedom to build on their property within the zoning laws. If a majority of the community doesn't think there should be houses like this, they should communicate a desire to change the zoning and elect representatives with the same view. This has happened in many neighborhoods in this city and is how things should work in a free democracy. This mayor has always made clear that he is a proponent of development in this city, and he has been elected twice, the second time by a landslide, and has very high approval ratings.

Anonymous said...

if you think this is a nicer looking house, you need glasses.

Anonymous said...

That might be true if builders actually built within the zoning regulations, but anything goes in Queens.

Queens Crapper said...

This says otherwise:

MAYOR MICHAEL R. BLOOMBERG AND QUEENS BOROUGH PRESIDENT HELEN MARSHALL ANNOUNCE THE REZONING OF QUEENS NEIGHBORHOODS TO HELP CURB OVER-DEVELOPMENT

"For many people in Queens, there are few issues more important than over-development," said Mayor Bloomberg. "Over-development can radically alter the traditional appearance and character of entire neighborhoods and often involves illegal construction, non-compliance with zoning rules, and poor quality construction. Our Administration is working with Borough President Helen Marshall, local elected officials and leaders of local civic and homeowners associations to address this pressing issue in Queens as we have done in other parts of the City."

Anonymous said...

What a hypocrite Bloomberg is!

Anonymous said...

helping to curb over-development? What a laugh.

Maybe Mike meant by this that he's planning to allow developers to build right up to the "curb."

Anonymous said...

"If a majority of the community doesn't think there should be houses like this, they should communicate a desire to change the zoning and elect representatives with the same view. This has happened in many neighborhoods in this city and is how things should work in a free democracy."

Maspeth, Middle Village and Glendale did that in 2004. It's 2007 and no zoning change yet. This is how things actually work in a democracy.

Anonymous said...

What is the correct address for this property on Annandale Lane?

Anonymous said...

instead of just one address it may have several, due to its size.

Queens Crapper said...

I actually clipped the house out of the picture when I took the satellite screenshot. The picture is now updated. Sorry for the confusion. Address is linked to post.

Anonymous said...

Address in posting links to home with no demolition permit or building permits.

eamallc said...

WHOA! Thats the biggest pile of crap Ive seen squeezed out in a long time. I feel so bad for the neighbors. The morons who build these gosh monstrosities think they are bringing property values up. They are actually bringing them down for all their neighbors. Would you want to live next to this? This will sound rather politically incorrect, but almost all of these houses have sort of a "foreign" feel. They dont have any "American" design qualities. They look like they belong in foreign lands.Hmmm

Queens Crapper said...

"Address in posting links to home with no demolition permit or building permits."

No, it was fixed along with the photo.

Anonymous said...

"...these houses have sort of a foreign feel."

yes, like they'd been built by aliens from outer space.

Anonymous said...

There's nothing to be jealous of.
This is one big sprawling low brow shit pile!
If I won this in a lottery....
it would be on the market the very next day.

Then I'd build me something with real class
not a Meson de merde, palazzo stu catazzo,
or casa di cacinna !

It looks like the owner is
"cashing in" and "putting on the dog".......
keeping up appearances.
"Hello....this is the Buquet (not the Bucket) residence"!

Hey....watsa matta wit you.....Little Neck.....
you couldn't afford Great Neck....maybe?

Anonymous said...

"Over-development can radically alter the traditional appearance and character of entire neighborhoods and often involves illegal construction, non-compliance with zoning rules, and poor quality construction.

Our Administration is working with Borough President Helen Marshall, local elected officials and leaders of local civic and homeowners associations to address this pressing issue in Queens as we have done in other parts of the City."

Once upon a time there was this cute little house on a beautiful oversized lot in Bayside.

There is no better example of all the above than Tommy Huang's "so-called" through-lot development project in Bayside which continues to languish and deteriorate. He has built four houses and a private road called Mia Drive. The quality of the houses speak for themselves. You need only to look at them.

The original house had one family that had two cars and three garbage cans. The new houses, if they ever get their certificates of occupancy (and that is questionable), will probably have no less than eight cars (very possibly more) and at the very least 12 garbage cans. Emergency vehicles and fire trucks could have difficulty getting down the road, the sanitation department will not be able to get down the road and the inhabitants are not to park their vehicles in the road. A reasonable person wonders how they got permission to build this road which by the way is not built according to DOT specifications.

We have been looking at these four pieces of crap for well over three years now. What a track record this guy has got. This project like most of his projects (40% of which are presently closed down they say) makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. A reasonable developer could have built two substantial houses, made a significant profit and finished the project in a reasonable period of time. Good news is they finally revoked his permits. You have to keep the pressure on otherwise nothing will ever happen. Now, rumor is he is going to exercise his option and appeal to the BSA to get his revoked permits back and appeal the DOB's objections. If my guess is right, he undoubtedly needs variances and waivers also.

Let's see how this plays out.

Carol said...

"Are you just jealous that your neighbors have a bigger, better house than yours?"

Why do people who erect these phallac symbols think that other people are jealous of them?

The owners of this house have jeopardized the integrity of an entire neighborhood and exploited as you say "the freedom to build on their property within the zoning laws".

The gaudy, sterile, and mass-produced appearance of these monster homes with their disportionate and actually juevenille design quality probably is well suited for the simple minded people like you who see its opponents as simply "jealous".

What infuriates others is the fact that the house is too big for the size of the lot. Is that too complex a concept for you?

Why build monster homes in charming neighborhoods? Why not take your stock options over to Kings or Sands Point where you can buy a few acres and monster away to your heart's delight? Is your ego so infantile that the thought of your home being (horrors) smaller than theirs kept you away?

All I see is a big ego with a little brain when I look at this house.

Anonymous said...

developers are constructing roads to their buildings? What next? Bridges?!