Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The puppetmaster and his puppet

Sung to the tune “Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah” by Alan Sherman

HELLO BLOOMBERG,

HELLO KLEIN,

ALL YOUR TEACHERS

HAVE LOST THEIR MINDS.

YOUR NEW WORKSHOPS AREN’T PRETTY.

WE WOULD BE SO GLAD IF YOU BOTH LEFT THE CITY.



ALL OUR CLASSES, ARE OVERCROWDED.

AND ALL OUR TEXTBOOKS, HAVE BEEN SHROUDED.

NOW WE’RE TEACHING, WITHOUT FOUNDATION,

WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE FUTURE GENERATION?



PLEASE JUST GO,

OH, MR. MAYOR,

PLEASE JUST GO,

DO US A FAVOR

AND MR. KLEIN,

YOU BOTH SHOULD GO AWAY, PLEASE LEAVE US AND JUST RESIGN.



FROM A ROCKER, WE’RE ALL READING,

BUT ARE OUR STUDENTS, ALL SUCCEEDING?

PLEASE EXPLAIN, HOW WE CAN ALL FIT,

A CLASS OF THIRTY-FIVE, ON A SMALL CARPET?



DON’T YOU THINK, IT WOULD BE WISE,

TO MAKE EACH CLASS, A SMALLER SIZE.

INSTEAD, YOU BOTH DECIDED,

ALL OUR READING SHOULD BE SHARED OR SHOULD BE GUIDED.



PLEASE, JUST GO

OH, MR. MAYOR,

PLEASE JUST GO, DO US A FAVOR,

AND MR. KLEIN,

YOU BOTH SHOULD GO AWAY, PLEASE LEAVE US AND JUST RESIGN.



NOW, ABOUT, WORKING CONDITIONS,

PARENTS SHOULD START, WRITING PETITIONS.

AND THE CHILDREN ARE ALL COMPLAINING,

IT’S TOO HOT AND CRAMPED, IT’S REALLY MUCH TOO DRAINING.



THE WINDOWS, IN THE CLASSES,

ONLY OPEN, UP SIX INCHES.

AND IF WE LEAVE THEM, OPEN TOO LONG,

PIGEONS FLY IN, AND MAKE THE CLASSES THEIR NEW HOME.



PLEASE JUST GO,

OH, MR. MAYOR

PLEASE JUST GO,

DO US A FAVOR,

AND MR. KLEIN,

YOU BOTH SHOULD GO AWAY, PLEASE LEAVE US AND JUST RESIGN.



ALL THE TEACHERS, WORK DAY AND NIGHT,

OUR MINI-LESSONS, MUST BE JUST RIGHT.

THE TEACHING POINT, ON CHARTS, NO CHALK,

WAIT A MINUTE, WE FORGOT TO “TURN AND TALK.”



NOW, LET’S TALK ABOUT THE NEW RULES.

NO MORE CHALKBOARDS, TO BE IN THE SCHOOLS.

CHILDREN’S SEATS, SHOULD BE IN FOURS,

WE DON’T REMEMBER VOTING ON THESE LAWS.



PLEASE JUST GO,

OH MR. MAYOR,

DO US A FAVOR,

AND MR. KLEIN,

YOU BOTH SHOULD GO AWAY, PLEASE LEAVE US AND JUST RESIGN.



TO THE TEACHER, YOU JUST SAY,

LONGER HOURS, NO MORE PAY.

OUR CONTRACT, YOU WON’T SIGN,

PLEASE DIRECT US TO THE NEAREST FOOD STAMP LINE.



A FEW LAST QUESTIONS, BEFORE WE GO,

HOW WERE YOU TAUGHT, YEARS AGO?

YOU SAT IN ROWS, WHAT A PITY!

ARE YOU SURE, YOU’RE SMART ENOUGH TO RUN THE CITY?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

KING BLOOMBERG WON'T GO!!! HE TALKING ABOUT A 4TH TERM. He ignores all the stacks of petitions on his desk since we are peasants. He has no regards for anyone that isn't importance. He is a vile man and measures importance by dollars. He has no compassion for peasants and their children. We must vote him and Quinn out of office.

italian girl said...

Thanks for that Crappy!!

Anonymous said...

wait....i'm sure this was all happening in public schools since i graduated .....in 1998 !

georgetheatheist said...

Actually, it was Jose, the bearded head in the box, who used to reply to Senor Wences with "s'awright". Wences' hand puppet, depicted in the photo, was Johnny who could sing beautifully while Wences drank a glass of water or smoked a cigarette.

(This site is so educational.)