Thursday, July 26, 2007

Multicultural crap

Hi Queens Crapper,

I actually don't think this building is all that horrendous. I should say that it is horrendous, just by being a condo off Steinway, but I've seen worse, LOTS WORSE. so I'm thankful it's not as bad as what's going up in Williamsburg or elsewhere. but I'm amused by how it is being marketed: European kitchens, Italian mosaics, Brazilian floors, Zen gardens, Manhattan views.
What about the Japanese light fixtures? The Swedish toilets? The Hungarian doormats?
It's nice to know Zen gardens are a commodity you can pre-fab into housing units now. Noguchi would be proud (barf!).

Cheerio,
Nick Normal

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

And it has the charming architecture of the iron-curtain era Soviet Bloc--so, yes, it is VERY international in scope.

Dave in Milwaukee

robin said...

Out of shot to the left: rollgated recently-closed Blockbuster location, grotesquely filthy subway entrance, charming hiphop adverts on tag-smeared wall. Out of shot to the right: auto yard with mangy dogs on sentry duty, shady-looking Italian restaurant no-one ever seems to enter or leave. Howdy, neighbor, and welcome to Not Quite Astoria.

http://hooverfactory.com

Anonymous said...

Hey....it's a step up for "Borat" !

Anonymous said...

Robin, yes! yes! yes!

Keep posting to the thread Astorians!

http://www.astorians.com/index.php?topic=6857.0

Anonymous said...

Its Queens. We have accepted without comment the machine's desire to brand us immigrant, in other words, tweeder territory.

Time for a fresh perspective and a new genertion.

Bye Claire! Bye Vicky! Bye Harriet! Bye Gary! Bye Helen!

Anonymous said...

I always like Queens: welllll, not as bad as it could beeee.

Losers.

Anonymous said...

To previous,

hey Astoria, speak for yourself!

Can't even field a decent civic that isn't a mouthpiece for some poltician.

Anonymous said...

This location was never built upon before (wasted on parking, right?)

It was also the location of Schutzen Park, perhaps the most signficant social and politicial gathering place in western Queens 1870-1925. Even just one afternoon for an archeologist would have yielded all sorts of goodies.

Well there goes another chapter of Queens history into a dumpster. Who cares?

You are from Queens. You know only need more tasteless crap.

Anonymous said...

Junk! Junk! Junk! I wouldn't be surprised how many violations it will rack up, if that hasn't happened already. An archaeological dig should be conducted, and the parkland should be restored. Whatever happened to Mayor Gloomie's PlaNYC 2030? I'll believe it when I see it!

Anonymous said...

Funny how those geek/developers love to conjure up images of the heroic classical past with such evocative names like "Ionian" !

Just paint it blue & white and everybody from ancient Athens will be clamoring across the Aegean Sea to buy into these "beautiful" condos on this new Astorian Acropolis!

Anonymous said...

Yeah....you could also call it..... Pericles Plaza, Herakles Hall, or Stavros City !

What an insult to the rich culture of the Hellas !

Anonymous said...

Maybe the builders will advertise it on a paper take out coffee cup from....let's say, maybe....the Neptune Diner ? !!!

Anonymous said...

clannish group.

sortof explains why we have nothing but cafes full of people that don't live here anymore, hogging the sidewalk, crowding out other forms of entertainment, pumping air conditioning into the open.

Anonymous said...

I recently watched a ludicrous bunch of Turks (apparently thinking they were sons of the ancient Hellas) fingering their "worry beads" in a Broadway cafe (gestulating and philosophizing like wannabee Platos in their newly found coffee house/Agoras) !

A scene right out of Seinfeld transported to Astoria!

There hasn't been a pure bloodline of Greeks around for over 2 thousand years !

Nick Normal said...

hey robin, you sure know your surroundings! glad to know someone else LOOKS UP when they walk.

Anonymous said...

Ha, ha, ha !

I wonder what Sigmund Freud would have said about a bunch of grown men ritualistically "fingering" a bunch of ivory or amber balls strung together ? Worry beads.....eh ?

I'd surely worry about those "guys" !

Maybe there is something in that old bit of whimsy about how they separate the men from the boys in the Greek army !
Wasn't it with a crowbar ? !!!